Supporting an LGBTQ person with dementia can be challenging, but it is important to remember that they deserve to be treated with dignity and respect just like any other person. Before diving deep into the matter, let’s address a few terminologies. First, the sexual orientation of a person is the romantic/emotional/sexual attraction towards others. Second is the gender identity of a person and how they view themselves. Individuals will have both identities unique to them. They tend to feel attraction to the same gender (gay/lesbian), both genders (bisexual), or two or more genders (pansexual). And trans individuals are those who do not identify with the gender they were assigned at birth. Therefore, LGBTQ individuals are a group of people who do not traditionally fit into heterosexual ideals i.e men who are attracted to women and vice versa.
Dementia compromises difficulties experienced in memory, thinking and social aspects of life. But, large numbers of these individuals won’t be impacted by their sexual or gender identity. Due to this LGBTQ+ people’s challenges are different and unique.
Some of the common challenges faced by LGBTQ+ individuals with dementia are:
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Stigma
The community still faces undesirable stereotypes which force them to remain closeted. And this causes them to not access the appropriate care for them. People with a homosexual orientation can hide their identities but it is not the same for trans folks so they become subjected to discrimination. Dementia as an illness also has stigma as others see their shortfalls as opposed to their assets, and capacity to appreciate numerous activities and relationships with others. -
Resistance to care
Though the community has far more recognition and acceptance in society, we must remember that older LGBTQ+ people have experienced years of prejudice and unfairness. These experiences shape how they look at the world too. Due to this, they are more likely to be independent, not access care and not leave their home (as their home is considered a safe space). -
Social isolation
Loneliness and social isolation is commonly experienced by those with dementia but compared to heterosexual individuals, LGBT people are more likely to feel loneliness and are concerned with growing old alone. Because of their harsh past experiences and unfairness, they have less interaction and eroding relationships between the person with dementia, family members and friends (SAGE, Alzheimer’s Association, 2018). -
Service negligence
There is often negligence in the health service industry for LGBTQ individuals. As they assume the patient to be heterosexual or non-transgender and don’t have the appropriate reaction when faced with families of the same sex.
“I wanted to see a therapist and they referred me to an ‘LGBT sensitive therapist.’ Several months into our conversations, I used the term “LGBT” and the therapist asked what it meant. She had no idea what it was!”.
– A man within the community who was living with dementia.So there needs to be education on LGBT cultural competency among those working in this industry.
Acknowledging their difficulties is necessary but adequate care and support are needed for these individuals. Ways in which one can support them are:
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Educate Yourself:
It is important to have a basic understanding of LGBTQ issues and how they may affect the individual with dementia. This will help you to be more sensitive and understanding of their needs.
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Advocate for their rights:
It is important to advocate for the individual’s rights, including their right to express their identity and to receive appropriate care. This may involve speaking up if you witness any discrimination or if the individual’s rights are not being respected.
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LGBTQ+ affirming language:
Being mindful of language can be extremely helpful in making them feel welcomed. Instead of assuming their sexual orientation, gender identity or pronouns, politely ask how they want to be addressed and stick to that. Before communicating, educate and train yourself with the appropriate language.
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Be patient:
Supporting individuals with dementia itself can be challenging, and since these individuals come with unique traumatic experiences it can be tiresome. As mentioned above, they are most likely to not seek care. So understand why they are so resistant and reassure them, and be there for them.
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Create a safe care place and welcoming environment:
Often time LGBTQ+ individuals are very protective of their home/safe space. Enquiring which health service places are LGBTQ+ sensitive can be beneficial and ensure the place makes them feel safe and comforted. Record their likes, dislikes and what is important to them so the professional is also aware to make the care person-centred. Make sure that the individual’s living environment is welcoming and inclusive. This may involve displaying LGBTQ-inclusive materials and symbols, such as rainbow flags or posters. -
Celebrate with them:
Month of June is commonly recognized as Pride month so celebrate this event with your loved one. Show that you respect their identity and are willing to be an ally. Since these older individuals might have not had the opportunity to celebrate their identity, this may be a good time. Include some of their older friends and create age-friendly activities. -
Seek out resources:
There are resources available to support LGBTQ individuals with dementia and their caregivers. These may include LGBTQ-inclusive support groups, online resources, and local organizations that can provide additional support and information.This will help them in creating a community of similar and shared experiences. Such groups will also make them feel less lonely in their journey.
As a community, these are a few ways in which we could create a promising reality of adequate, respectful and necessary care for LGBTQ+ people living with dementia because they deserve this.
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